It’s like when Windows does this, but in real life.
IM GOING TO STAB MYSELF IN THE FOOT I JUST SENT MY ENGLISH TEACHER MY ESSAY ON HAMLET AND IT WAS STILL NAMED “the fresh prince of denmark yo holla”
oh man, i love receiving unedited final drafts:
cracks me up every time
"Every 35 days, you grow a new skin - cells created from what you eat. Therefore my mother wasn’t lying when she warned me: you are what you eat. I was sunshine and candy corn when we started; a mess of coffee and secondhand smoke, when we fell apart."-Lora Mathis (via unseralaska)
oh, you know, just casually photographing the apocalypse
this is crazy
My roommate and his girlfriend got in the shower together and they’re… Talking about politics?
I was expecting to hear “OH GOD, HARDER,” not “George Washington was entirely correct in his prediction of what distinct parties would do to politics as a whole.”
Nope nevermind, there it is, apparently political debate is just their form of foreplay
STOP REBLOGGING THIS HE HAS A TUMBLR
I work at a big chain bookstore. Someone at another store found this while tidying up the children’s department.
The American Hogwarts Houses
Look at your school of witchcraft and wizardry. Now look at mine. Now yours. Now back to mine. Sadly, your school is not mine, but if you all got off your broomsticks and started using a real sorcerer’s deodorant, it could smell like mine. Abracadabra! I’m a horse.
Good. Night. I’m done.